So on this incident:

 

 

You have two options to believe:

 

 

1. That I said this out of hatred and vanity for my mom,

who tried to dismiss or lessen the effect of abuse that was held to me

by my father since the age of 3. And shock factor was the only

way to get through.

 

 

2. Or, you could simply believe I said this out of some

momentary delusional bravado, sharing this beautiful secrecy

with my mom, and decided to forget about it, shortly after.

 

 

 

Either way.

 

 

 

You can damn dismiss it as a flair in creativity in imagination.

 

 

 

But. When you read the context of it,

 

can you see the nature of it is indeed about anger?

 

 

 

So I think 1 is probably more accurate by your reasoning.

 

 

Kindly, drop it now.