But this also doesn't mean I am gay/bi/trans.

 

No offense to the LGBT community.

 

 

I have always wanted a girl as long as I can remember.

 

But. Just not in THAT way.

 

 

Not that I think I was anything special.

 

But I wanted 'love'. As sentimental as it may sound.

 

 

 

And while, those values eventually faded away.

 

As I was aging, and haven't had any experience.

 

 

"Love" was for someone else. Not with a guy without even a job.

 

(Back then I had much hope for myself, still thinking I would become

rich by investment and commission. So no.)

 

 

So I was tempted in Toronto few times as that is legal. (There are escorts here)

 

But still, I couldn't go for it.

 

 

And that was for the better it seems.

 

Now I can think about real love and what follows.