One must understand that some of those harassers,

they go on. Every single day. At my sight.

 

I have told Douglas several times that

people here can be dangerous, some of

them are mentally ill, and they mean to

start a fight.

 

When it persisted, I had no choice but

to go down to the 'lion's den' (the TV room)

half aware my talk wouldn't work out,

but at least I can convey a message that

I am not a dangerous person.

 

(So not to be threatened again as violent

as before, the stabbing)

 

I have no idea who is lurking with what

mindset.

 

And yes, having gone through that and

continuing, despite the fact that I did not

want to. I went there, and spoke very politely.

 

I was ready to converse, discuss, as adults.

But it became rather childish, and my words

were often halted.

 

And Douglas came in, agitated, flushed, angry,

asking me to fight him outside.

 

You need to admit that I tried talking to you,

many times. That something has to be told

in order for all this to stop.

 

You would not listen, responded with agitation

and deliberate avoidance/frustrated anger.

 

What is also unreal is many of his 'mischief'

(if you can call it that) deviating away from

our agreement in a very deliberate way,

these weren't mentioned.

 

One does this long enough, but especially after

the threat made by his friend, that becomes

bullying. Overpowering a person. Distance was

the correct thing to do, as I asserted.

 

Nor was his behavior. Erratic, and intimidating,

hostile, misleading. In the room, dismissed in his

own mind. Everything he does appeared to be

rationalized into 'no big deal'.

 

You were being an 'ass' Douglas,

at least admit to this.

 

And certainly, it should not have led there

to a fight.

 

But you certainly practiced in your mind

quite often did you not?

 

Your talks with your friends, those angry rants...

 

The thing about Douglas is that he does what he wants.

And even though it is wrong to do so,

he is never sorry for it.

 

It doesn't matter how it affects the person.

 

And yes, in different ways, you have done wrong.

 

And I had no choice but to be involved.

 

Who wants to get threatened everyday in some

weird, passive ranting?

 

What if a fight is triggered?

 

But again, you thought about yourself.

Your image. Instead my well-being,

despite all these things you started.

 

Am I being fair?

 

I tried talking to you, your responses are as

I mentioned.

 

Ultimate question is this.

That is what everyone needs to think about.

 

Did 'I' have violent intent?

Or did he.

 

Who leans to this?

Who was setting the pathway towards this?

 

Who was truly in the defense?

 

 

What did he do wrong?

 

 

Many. Beyond what i'm writing about.

 

In a deeper level as well.

 

He was also in the channel prior.

 

I believe there are pre-meditated thoughts about it.