And very contradictory how she makes it out to be.

 

If she distanced Wongi from my child self, because I seem aggressive/violent.

 

What would she have done if my father hit Wongi the way he has on me?

 

But somehow in her mind, my suffering is okay.

 

 

Extremely selfish reasoning.

 

 

And she has no idea. I was fearing for my LIFE. Not just bodily harm.

 

That was the intensity I endured since a little child.

 

 

If this *itch thinks that is okay.....

 

 

Ok. I'm sorry to get myself worked up. She wouldn't know the details.

 

My father showed completely dual-sides.

 

 

But if she knows. And she still thinks it's okay.

 

 

 

Her sons needs a beating like I have been.

 

 

See what comes of her. xD (I'm not serious but i'm pointing out how her reaction would be.)

 

 

She would never say her sons would deserve such beating.

 

Let alone, the reasons I was beat was not because I was a bad kid,

but to suppress my confidence, to "instill fear" so the child will not grow up to eat the father.

 

It was a pure game of ego and manipulation, abuse.

 

 

I apologize for my assumption. But these are the messages I believe I was getting long ago.

 

I won't forgive my extended family for all the wrong they did.

 

 

 

And if you were to ask, why I helped.

 

 

 

I remember as a child, mom put these pickled meat (in soy sauce) in a jar and told me to give it

to Wongi's family as gift.

 

I remember Wongi opening the jar and eating that with his hands and he suddenly was choking.

He was eating it in haste, as if he was starving.

 

 

I remember I was crying on the inside as I watched this.

 

It's something I ate everyday. For him, if I wasn't wrong. It was meat to eat.

 

 

And to think that they still lived in poverty.

 

I didn't want that. Somehow that image is burned into my head.

 

 

So that is why.

 

 

It's not like they did particular good. But, I guess I have some heart for them.

 

 

But if Wongi's mom.... Diminishes or dismisses my suffering I endured,

 

all the sleepless nights driven in fear and anger because of my father and my sister.

 

 

She has no right.